i'm an american!

I'm not an avid fan of morning tv. In fact, I don't even know what shows are on in the morning if it weren't for the tvs at the gym. I lumbered onto the treadmill this morning and started doing some uphill walking. Shortly after that, Iyanla came on and I thought "hey, this is good because I've always wanted to see what her show's all about since she's got all those books out and all." And the bonus of it all was that today's topic was on: SEX.

Now, usually I like to watch shows like this in the privacy of my own room and giggle at the stuff people say, not say in the company of perfect strangers who are sweating away alongside me. But oh well, I'll make an exception today. So they had these men and women who came on air to tell the audience what they liked in the opposite sex and what they want in bed.

"Someone who's educated."

"Someone who doesn't think it's a chore to have sex."

Well let me get this straight, are men saying they want a women's mind as well as their body and someone who actually likes sex? I think that's impossible to find. :P Men, open your eyes, women are educated and smart if you'll give them a chance to say something instead of trying to get into their pants half drunk off your ass. And women who only think it's a chore to have sex with you is probably because you can't find the right hole or you roll over and sleep once you've come and leave her dangling in a non-orgasmic mode.

Shortly after that, on the tv screen they plastered this big old drawing of a woman's nether region to do what? To show people that all the parts are closely placed together and that our clit is not 2 inches away from where you normally think it is. It's not a fuckin Grand Canyon guys. Showing the labia and vulva was no biggie on the screen because it didn't look like anything much if you weren't paying attention. It was actually good to learn all those terms in case I need to talk to my OBGyn about something.

But ho, when they posted a drawing of the man's nether region -- I noticed several men nearby looking away immediately. There it was a giant....lotus root. They proceeded to then talk about where a man normally likes to be touched on his penis. It turns out that it's near the base of the stem. Hell, I thought men just liked women to touch them on their penis...period! Does it matter where we touch you? This brings to mind that "root chakra" episode from Sex and the City's 2nd Season. So now I wonder if it's all true about knowing how to pleasure your mate that keeps them by your side? Is sex that important in one's life that it can make or break a relationship? I would think that yes, it's important in some aspects but it's not everything.

Unlike a woman's box, the man's apparatus is out in plain view and makes it easy for us to figure out how to maneuver that joystick. Heck just stroke, caress, touch, suck, tickle and every spot becomes the 'right' spot. However the mechanics to a woman's engine isn't so easy to figure out. Maybe that's why there's so many sex toys on the market.....because men just can't do what 2 double A batteries can. ;)

look at the hot chili peppers (grown from our garden) we are drying out in the sun

I'm out.